Best Insurance jokes | Funny Insurance jokes

Rad the collection of the best  funniest insurance jokes Insurance Jokes, Insurance Joke, Joke about Insurance, Insurance Agent jokes, Insurance is not normally a laughing matter and jokes.

Funny Insurance Jokes

One day, an American life insurance company received a letter from a lady saying that unfortunately they have to cancel her husband’s life insurance policy. ‘We always paid it in time’, she wrote, ‘but since my dear husband’s sudden death last year we have had some financial hardship; therefore, we would like not to pay it anymore’.


Life insurance agent to would-be client:

“Don’t let me frighten you into a hasty decision. Sleep on it tonight. If you wake in the morning, give me a call then and let me know.”


You ought to feel highly honored,” said the businessman to the life insurance agent, “so far today I have had my secretary turn away seven insurance agents.”

“Yes, I know,” replied the agent, “I’m one of them.”


A life insurance agent was completing an application and got to the part on health history. He asked his client how his grandfather died.

Funny Insurance Jokes
A Life Insurance agent decides to take a good friend with him to the horse race track and enjoy the afternoon. When he returns home his wife asks, “How was your day, did you make any money.”

He replies back “Well, I didn’t make any money today, but my client sure learned how gambling with the numbers certainly doesn´t pay off.”


Funny Insurance Jokes

Statue

An insurance agent went to a museum and he accidentally hit a statue.

Museum Administrator: “That’s a 500-year-old statue you’ve broken!”

Insurance agent: “Thank God! I thought it was a new one.”


Happy boss

A happy insurance boss says to his employees, “You worked very hard this year. As a reward, I’ll give everyone a check for $5,000. If you work with the same zeal next year, I’ll sign those checks.”


The underwriter & his wife

Underwriter’s wife: “You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?”

Underwriter: “When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.”

Underwriter’s wife: “You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?”

Underwriter: “Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, ‘What other problem can there be greater than this one?'”


 Woman, man & insurance

These two jokes are compliments of students in CE seminars:

Question: Do you know what a woman and insurance have in common?

Answer: They are both expensive, difficult to understand and what you get is not guaranteed.

Question: Do you know the difference between a man and a whole life policy?

Answer: A whole life policy eventually matures

 


Funny Insurance Jokes

“Do you know the present value of your husband´s policy?” the life insurance salesman asked his client.

“What do you mean?” countered the woman.

“If you should lose your husband, what would you get?” asked the salesman.

The woman thought a minute, then brightened up and said, “Probably a poodle.”


 

That awkward moment when you deliver a highly rated life insurance policy…

“Whenever I deliver a highly rated life insurance policy, I remind the insured that while the premium may be higher, given their health, they won’t pay nearly so long! Then I smile and chuckle a bit, they chuckle too, and they accept the policy. Deep down, pretty much all people know what their health status really is … so don’t let ‘em blow smoke at you.”


Introverts vs. extroverts, and one correction

“What’s the difference between an introverted actuary and an extroverted actuary? An introverted actuary looks at his shoes when he talks to you. An extroverted actuary looks at your shoes . . .”

To which another reader commented: “Oldest joke in the book except it is the difference between an actuary and an accountant.” – Never gets old


The real question is: Can your wife really get remarried?

“I was trying to deliver a life insurance policy to a fella who kept insisting to me that his wife could always get remarried. Finally, I blurted out ‘have you looked at her lately?’ He took the policy …”