Maths jokes : Mathematical Jokes

Funny Maths Joke: Mathematical jokes are based on the funny things about Mathematical these jokes are meant for fun,So enjoy these jokes here. Read some of The best math jokes

Funny Maths Jokes:

Q: Why do they never serve beer at a math party?

A: Because you can’t drink and derive…

Q: Why didn’t the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?

A: Because it had more cents.

Q: Did you hear about the constipated mathematician?

A: He worked it out with a pencil.

Q: How many molecules in a bowl of guacamole?

A: Avacado’s Number

Q: What happened to the plant in math class?

A: It grew square roots.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip?

A: To get to the same side.


Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Teacher: “Who can tell me what 7 times

6 is?”

Student: “It’s 42!”

Teacher: “Very good! – And who can

tell me what 6 times 7 is?”

Same student: “It’s 24!”


 

Funny Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Q: What does the zero say to the

the eight?

A: Nice belt!


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Q: What does a mathematician present to

his fiancée when he wants to propose?

A: A polynomial ring


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

4 Q: What is the most erotic number?

A: 2110593!

Q: Why?

A: When 2 are 1 and don’t pay at10tion,

they’ll know within 5 weeks whether or

not, after 9 months, they’ll be 3…


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Trigonometry for farmers: swine and coswine…


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Life is complex: it has both real and

imaginary components.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Three statisticians go hunting.

When they see a rabbit, the first

one shoots, missing it on the left.

The second one shoots and misses it

on the right. The third one shouts:

“We’ve hit it!”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Q: What is the value of the contour

integral around Western Europe?

A: Zero.

Q: Why?

A: Because all poles are in Eastern Europe!


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

“What is Pi?”

A mathematician: “Pi is the ratio

of the circumference of a circle to

its diameter.”

A computer programmer: “Pi is

3.141592653589 in double precision.”

A physicist: “Pi is

3.14159 plus or minus 0.000005.”

An engineer: “Pi is about 22/7.”

A nutritionist: “Pie is a healthy

and delicious dessert!”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Q: Why do mathematicians often

confuse Christmas and Halloween?

A: Because Oct 31 = Dec 25.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

In a dark, narrow alley, a function

and a differential operator meet:

“Get out of my way – or I’ll differentiate

you till you’re zero!”

“Try it – I’m ex…”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

A statistician can have his head in

an oven and his feet in ice, and he

will say that on the average he feels fine.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

LITTLE BOY : “My math teacher is crazy”.

MOTHER     : “Why?”

LITTLE BOY : “Yesterday she told us

that five is 4+1;today

she is telling us that

five is 3 + 2.”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Question: “How many seconds are

there in a year?”

Answer: “Twelve, January second,

February second, March second, …”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Teacher: “What is seven Q plus three Q?”

Student: ” Ten Q”

Teacher: “You’re Welcome.”


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke – Applying For A Job

Applying For A Job There are three people applying for the same job. One is a mathematician,

one a statistician,

and one an accountant. The interviewing committee first calls in the mathematician.

They say “we have only one

question. What is 500 plus 500?” The mathematician, without hesitation,

says “1000.” The committee sends him

out and calls in the statistician. When the statistician comes in, they ask the same question.

The statistician ponders the question for a moment, and then

answers “1000… I’m 95% confident.” He is then also thanked for his time and sent

on his way. When the accountant enters the room, he is asked the same

question: “what is 500 plus 500?” The accountant

replies, “what would you like it to be?” They hire the accountant. Father: What did you do

in school today? Son:

We played a guessing game! Father: I thought you had your math exam. Son: Exactly!


Maths Joke :Mathematical joke – Statisticians Hunting

Two statisticians go bird hunting. The first one fires at the bird but

overshoots by 5 feet. The second one fires and undershoots the bird by 5 feet.

They both give each other a high-five and say “Got it!”.


Maths Joke :Mathematical joke – Wife or Girlfriend

A physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist discuss what is better: a wife or a girlfriend.

The physicist: “A girlfriend. You still have freedom to experiment.” The mathematician: “A wife.

You have security.” The computer scientist: “Both. When I’m not with my wife, she thinks I’m with my girlfriend.

With my girlfriend it’s vice versa. And I can be with my computer without anyone disturbing me…”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke -Vacation

A mathematician, an engineer, and a computer scientist are vacationing together.

They are riding in a car, enjoying the countryside, when suddenly the engine stops working.

The mathematician: “We came past a gas station a few minutes ago. Someone should

go back and ask for help.” The engineer: “I should have a look at the engine. Perhaps,

I can fix it.” The computer scientist: “Why don’t we just open the doors, slam them shut,

and see if everything works again?”


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke -Little Boy

Son: “My math teacher is crazy”.

Mother: “Why?”

Son: “Yesterday she told us that five is 4+1; today she is telling us that five is 3 + 2.”


 

 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke -Girlfriend

 

“What happened to your girlfriend, that really cute math student?” “She no longer

is my girlfriend. I caught her cheating on me.” “I don’t believe that she cheated

on you!” “Well, a couple of nights ago I called her on the phone, and she told me

that she was in bed wrestling with three unknowns…”


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke -Descartes

 

So Descartes goes into a bar late one night for a beer. At closing time,

the bartender makes Last Call and asks him, “Get you another?” Descartes replies,

“I think not.” And disappears.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

I used to think maths was useless, but then one day I realised that decimals had a point.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Son: Dad, it’s so cold in here! Father: Go stand in the corner. Son: Why? Father: The corner is 90 degrees.


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke – An engineer and a physicist

An engineer and a physicist are in a hot-air balloon. After a few hours they lose track of

where they are and descend to get directions. They yell to a jogger, “Hey, can you tell us

where we’re at?” After a few moments the jogger responds, “You’re in a hot-air balloon.

” The engineer says, “You must be a mathematician.” The jogger, shocked, responds,

“yeah, how did you know I was a mathematician?” “Because, it took you far too long to

come up with your answer, it was 100% correct, and it was completely useless.”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Student: What’s infinity? Math Teacher: Think of a number. Student: Okay, I’ve got one. Teacher: Good. That’s not it.


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Three professors (a physicist, a chemist, and a statistician) are called in to see their dean.

Just as they arrive the dean is called out of his office, leaving the three professors there.

The professors see with alarm that there is a fire in the wastebasket. The physicist says,

“I know what to do! We must cool down the materials until their temperature is lower than

the ignition temperature and then the fire will go out.” The chemist says, “No! No! I know

what to do! We must cut off the supply of oxygen so that the fire will go out due to lack of one of

the reactants.” While the physicist and chemist debate what course to take, they both are alarmed

to see the statistician running around the room starting other fires. They both scream, ”

What are you doing?” To which the statistician replies, “Trying to get an adequate sample size.”


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

A statistician’s wife had twins. He was delighted. He rang the minister who was also delighted.

“Bring them to church on Sunday and we’ll baptize them,” said the minister. “No,” replied the

statistician. “Baptize one. We’ll keep the other as a control.”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

Equation

Men = eat + sleep + earn money

Donkeys = eat + sleep Therefore,

Men = Donkeys + earn money

Therefore,

Men – earn money = Donkeys

In other words,

Men that don’t earn money = Donkeys


 

 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

A logician’s wife is having a baby. The doctor immediately hands the new born to the dad.

His wife asks impatiently: “So, is it a boy or a girl” ? The logician replies: “yes”


 

Maths Joke :Mathematical joke

The bartender asks: “Would all three of you like some beer?” The first one replies, “I don’t know.” The second one replies, “I don’t know either.” The third replies, “Yes.”